Maggie the X-terminator

My duties around the house have X-panded!

The other day I X-pressed a profound interest in the corner of my Poo Patch and X-citedly danced around sniffing and yapping and X-tolling the virtues of my X-tremely loud bark, knowing as I do, that the louder it gets, the more likely They are to come and investigate what's got me going. So that's X-catly what happened! It took a few days, but at least Their suspicions were sufficiently aroused to come running every time I started the X-pression Session at the Poo Patch Corner.

Around the same time, there were a couple of Visiting Possums keeping me up at night, and because of the nature of things, if I'm up and yapping then They are up and concerned about me, and so the Vicious Cycle of sleepless nights for all of us begins... Anyway, She decided that the Visiting Possums wouldn't visit if the Lady Next Door kept her garden in check and cut back the vegetation at least once a year. Ho Hum. Given the drought has ended (and then some...), the weather's still warm, the LDN's passion fruit is outta control.

So She figures, if the passion fruit weren't there, the Visiting Possums would Vanish and She would get some sleep... She diligently picked up those that had fallen on our side of the fence, but got distracted and left them on my Poo Patch, meaning to toss 'em out with my next poo. Problem is, She forgot, and the next morning, the middle of one of the fruit was eaten out. So She knew something was out there, and thought it was the Visiting Possums who had taken up residence in the hidden corner of my Poo Patch that I was constantly investigating.

So the next evening, I was X-acting every last breath from my lungs in the corner of my Poo Patch and He stuck his head out and caught sight of a tail disappearing under the house! Bingo - unwelcome visitor sighted.

So the next evening, we went to the Possum Man's House down the road and we got some cages. The Possum Man is very scary, but I was very X-cited about the prospect of my mission being accomplished. And so it was... The next morning there was a little mouse wishing it hadn't taken advantage of the apple He left inside the cage under the house!


I supervised while He got the cage, making sure everyone in the neighborhood knew of our success. I was strapped into the lead on His one hand, while the little mouse was locked in the cage in His other hand and we ran all the way down to the creek. I barked and barked the whole way so people would know we were coming and move out the way promptly. He tried to shut me up by running faster (it's quite hard work to run and bark at the same time, I have to say, but boy, I had a good go at it...)

I made up a little rhyme for this bit -

When we got to the creek
We let the 'rat out of the bag' so to speak
I hoped he could swim
Otherwise he'd get very thin
But I did what I was bred to do
ID the bad guy and give Them the clue!

I kept watch of the cages just in case something else reappeared. It took a lot of concentration. The next night, we took the cages back to the Possum Man. He was still scary. Anyway, I thought I would get a medal or something for being such an intrepid hunter, but I just got lots of pats and proud looks. Maybe someone will nominate me for a Purple Heart... (other than the one's on my blankie)